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When did you realize you were really in labor?
After drinking a castor oil concoction from my midwife, I went to my room to rest; my husband and 2 other children were about to have lunch, but I had no appetite. I started cramping slowly and lightly, and then more intensely—but it wasn't painful. After a while of what felt like strong Braxton Hicks, I called my doula. During the minutes I was on the phone with her, those "cramps" turned into contractions 3-minutes apart and lasting well over a minute. I couldn't talk through them, and by the end of the call I had handed the phone over to my husband and asked her to come. Things completely changed during that short phone call! Having my doula on the way was exciting, because it meant I was finally in labor! I was 41 week, 5 days.
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What was the most challenging thing about going natural?
The most challenging thing about going natural for me was being perceived as counter-cultural. This was odd for me at first, since natural is the "original" way to birth. However, it has become so far removed from our culture's memory that to go natural is seen as scary, backwards, and even pointless. As a home birther, I have been told that I was doing was "brave." It is challenging to be perceived as the brave one, when US hospitals have the highest rates of maternal and infant mortality. I think you'd have to be brave to deliver in a hospital!
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What was the most helpful thing you did to prepare for childbirth?
I did a lot to prepare for labor—the Mama Natural childbirth course, red raspberry leaf tea daily, dates consumption from 36 weeks, yoga, regular chiropractic, and reading my birth affirmation cards. But as I neared, and then went past, my due date I became increasingly anxious and fearful. To help me maintain a positive and anticipatory frame of mind, I had to abstain from all birth-related media—including birth stories, videos, podcasts, books, and even my birth course Facebook group. I recognized how these stories—both the ideal AND the difficult—got in my head and made it almost impossible for me to stay a steady, positive mental course. Recognizing and removing those obstacles allowed me to put my energy into maintaining a positive head-space, instead of always fighting to get it back.
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What surprised you about your birth?
The most surprising thing about my birth was how fast it went! With my first, I had labor start-stop for over 3 days, my waters were ruptured for over 30 hours, I got transferred to the hospital, pushed for 4 hours, and capped it all off with a c-section. With my son, I had a VBAC home birth, but it was long and difficult—13 hours active and with back labor. This birth was dreamy because it took only 5 hours from "cramps" to baby! When my midwife arrived she checked me and I was at 6cm. This was not a surprise, but going from 6cm to 10cm in 4 contractions and 15 minutes was a HUGE surprise! Delivering on the bed on all fours because the birth tub wasn't filled in time was another surprise! And the biggest surprise of all was my having my baby girl, in 3 pushes, delivered in the caul!
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The best thing abut the Mama Natural Birth Class for us was the way it got us talking about various topics. While we could've learned the same information in another format, the videos were the quickest and most convenient way to do it together.
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What pain relief strategies worked best?
The pain relief strategies I expected to use were the ones that had worked for me in the past. Since this was my third delivery, I had a good idea of what I needed. I had back labor with my first two children, and both times I wanted someone to press on my lower back as hard as they could. But this time, that was extremely painful for me! I also never got to use the birth tub, like I did with my other two, because things went too fast. The most helpful thing for me was having my doula read one birth affirmation card (I had previously picked out the ones that meant the most to me) with each contraction and hold essential oils under my nose, while my husband held and coached me. Their reminders to relax, breathe, and keep my vocalizations low made a huge difference. The pain was really intense—I had back labor again, and my contractions were all around 2 minutes long. But, the amazing team of my doula and husband helped me cope with the pain.
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What position did you end up delivering in?
I delivered on all fours on our bed. I had thought I would deliver in the tub, but it wasn't full in time. I started pushing laying down on my side, but that was awkward and painful for me. At that point, it became evident that I was going to deliver on the bed instead of in the tub, so my midwife needed to move me so they could quickly put some plastic down. I instinctively moved forward onto my hands and knees, and in 3 pushes my girl was born!
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How did it feel to hold your baby for the first time?
Holding my baby for the first time was not the euphoric experience I expected it to be. I was in a state of shock by the time she came out—it all happened SO quickly that my mind was about an hour behind reality. Because she was born in the caul (amniotic sac), she was extremely slippery. But, I didn't understand that's what was going on. My midwife had passed her under me and when I tried to pick her up, she just kept slipping from my grasp! It took me a few minutes to recover because the birth was so sudden and I also had a hemorrhage. But once I had her on my chest and started talking to her, I began to "come to" and engage with what was happening. Shortly thereafter, my husband checked to see if we had a son or a daughter (we still didn't know at this point!), and then then we both celebrated the little person who had just joined our family.
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How did the Mama Natural Birth Class help you in your childbirth?
The best thing abut the Mama Natural Birth Class for us was the way it got us talking about various topics. While we could've learned the same information in another format, the videos were the quickest and most convenient way to do it together. We would frequently pause the video to have a conversation about the topic at hand. It was a great way to get on the same page about the birth and our expectations.