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When did you realize you were really in labor?
I woke up to what I now know were light contractions at around 4 in the morning. I had this sense before I went to bed the night before that it was going to happen that night. I wasn't for sure that they were legit contractions so I started timing them in the timer app I had installed a couple weeks prior. After I saw that there was a clear 5 min. pattern between them I woke up my husband and told him I thought it was happening. His response was are you sure? It just had felt like we had waited so long since we were expecting her to come 3 weeks prior like our daughter, Jordan, had. He was really tired and so I went downstairs to the bathroom hoping it would tell me if it was just Braxton Hicks (because if I got up and did some things supposedly they would stop if they were). I walked around got a drink and then went back upstairs they were so light and not painful just uncomfortable. With my daughter Jordan they had come on so strong very quickly and only after my water had broke so this was a very different experience for me. I tried to wake my husband back up to tell him I was pretty sure this is it! It's time! I knew we had to get the birthing pool finished setting up (plus moved into a different room...long dif. story) and get the water started because I had my heart set on a water birth. I went downstairs to move the tub to the kitchen and get the liners in...this took a little bit on my own but was an amazing distraction for me! This made a good hour fly by! While I was setting it up I had a thought that I should call my sister and my mom, but I dismissed it because I thought what if it isn't time yet...then they would be here for nothing. I wasn't even confident about it enough to call my midwife yet. In hindsight this was exactly when I should have called them. When it came time to fill the pool I didn't know how to turn up the heat on the hot water heater so I went back upstairs to ask my husband to come help. He came down and turned it up then looked into getting the water hooked up to the hose to fill the pool. I was focused on getting it set up until he came down and then my focus was back on contractions. I decided I needed to call my midwife as by now it was 5:54 and they were a min. long with about 3-4 min. in between. (I remember looking down at the time so clearly! Haha...don't know why that stands out.) There really wasn't any urgency in her voice and she responded by saying to call her back in an hour or if the pains got sharper...which 30 min. later they definitely were!
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What was the most challenging thing about going natural?
My husband stayed focused on finishing the birthing pool for me. The water source for the pool was the washer hook up, however my husband couldn't get it to turn off so he could hook the new hose to it due to corrosion which we had no idea was there. He continued to work at it and ended up rigging something up to the shower head to get it to work while I stayed on the couch. After he got it going he joined me on the couch to help put pressure on my back.
My midwife arrived around 8:30. She checked the baby's heartbeat and started setting up her things...I continued to push deeply on my lower mid back with each contraction. They were so intense at this point and I started to feel a slight sensation to bear down with some of them. For some reason I had it in my mind that I shouldn't push since my water hadn't broke yet.
Her assistant arrived about 10 minutes later and was a God send! She immediately started massaging my back and applying pressure in all of the right places! I heard her make a comment to the midwife about it sounding like I needed to push already and when the midwife acknowledged that I and I knew it was ok I started to bear down some. They told my husband who was trying to get the tub filled for me (because he knew my heart was set on using it) that it wasn't going to happen and just to forget about it since the baby was coming soon. I quickly regrouped mentally about not going that route.
After pushing with a few contractions my water broke and things got extremely real. Her assistant helped remind to me breathe through each contraction and I tried to focus on that. It helped a lot! I knew my daughter wouldn't want to miss it so I asked my husband to go get her.
Within that time I could feel her come down and her head was right there ready to come out. I pushed and stopped naturally as it felt like I was really stretching. I worked at it for a few contractions. I started to feel what other people had described as a ring of fire. I wouldn't describe it as it getting that intense for me but the thought of it getting that intense frightened me a little. It started to feel like I wasn't going to be able to work through the fear and push her head out. All of the sudden I focused on my daughter and husband encouraging me. It seriously gave me the strength to push through and do it! The whole time I visualized in my head her coming out! With their encouragement I got her head out! Then after a couple more pushes her shoulders and the rest of her body! I seriously couldn't believe that I worked through and did it! Later my midwife told me I did amazing and that it was a good thing I took the time to stretch enough to get her head out because she was so big and I didn't tear at all!
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What was the most helpful thing you did to prepare for childbirth?
I worked out A LOT...not intense work outs but I stayed committed to my goal of working out every day for 10 min. Per day. I also drank red raspberry leaf tea at the end. I think both of these things helped. I watched countless videos and read lots of positive stories but Most of all I personally stayed positive about how my experience was going to go. I didn't let any negativity around. I surrounded myself with positive supportive people in my life. It's best to research what people are trying to get you to do before you jump in and do it during pregnancy and for the decisions during/right after birth. Mama Natural was such an amazing resource for me to get information! Please do your research don't just believe the first articles you read on a subject to help you make a decision. I recommend looking further until you find an opinion on the opposite side and then make your decision. There are a couple of things I wish that I would have done that on.
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What surprised you about your birth?
Zayah Brynn was 9lbs. 4 oz. born at 9:09 am on November 1st! I was shocked she was so big! My daughter, Jordan, was only 6lbs. 7oz.! I was so fully aware of everything that was taking place during the birth. I definitely am thankful that I took this approach and this experience I will remember and cherish it forever. It seriously was amazing to me how my body told me what to do when I would stop and listen and breathe with it. When you truly know everything is going to work out well it all just falls into place.
In the end I wasn't able to use the pool...she was born on our new couch...and that was ok! Sometimes it's just what you needed to happen that actually happens. I am so thankful for my husband who was committed to trying up until the last minute to make it happen the way I planned for me. He is my rock and always looks out for me. I am also extremely thankful for my daughter, Jordan, who encouraged me in ways she will probably never fully realize to push through and rise above the pain.
Best advice I can give to other ladies out there going into birth...educate yourself as much as you can, it's good to have a plan, but be open to things not quite working the way you thought.
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Research for yourself (don't believe the first thing you hear or even what you think the majority has to say on a subject), videos, and positive thoughts before/during/after! Know in your heart you can do this and be able to adapt quickly when things don't go as planned.
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What pain relief strategies worked best?
The contractions got intense and I felt them very extreme in the mid part of my back. It was like I needed constant pressure on it to relieve them. At first to get through the contractions I visualized a peaceful enjoyable place. (Standing under a warm waterfall in a tropical setting...not sure if that exists) I imagined the warm water just rushing over me and it helped. Eventually though this was not enough so I switched to visualizing each contraction working her down and into position to come out. Between my husband and myself we kept massaging deeply into my mid back when they came. They constant pressure being applied helped the most with pain relief! I definitely think your partner knowing where to apply pressure for relief is important for you if you experience back labor!
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What position did you end up delivering in?
Everything after texting my midwife seemed to happen extremely fast! I texted her to let her know and she replied by saying she was getting ready to leave then. I put the plastic down on the couch with a blanket over it (I was preparing for my water to break) and tried to lay there but the only position I could stand was on all fours. I stayed in that same position and spot until I delivered. I seriously couldn't move into any other position as it would just feel like I couldn't handle the pain in my back.
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How did it feel to hold your baby for the first time?
It was amazing to be able to be given her right away and be able to just hold her!!!! I held her for a good hour and was able to let her nurse right away! With my first daughter it was like they quick dropped her on my chest and then took her right back away! I was so out it from the pain relievers with her that I didn't have those clear moments. This connection is a big part of why I am so glad that I went natural and at home this time!!!!
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What advice can you give to other mamas who want to go natural?
Research for yourself (don't believe the first thing you hear or even what you think the majority has to say on a subject), videos, and positive thoughts before/during/after! Know in your heart you can do this and be able to adapt quickly when things don't go as planned. I'm a big planner so the last one was tough for me. I had a vision of exactly what it was going to be like (even though everyone tells you not to) and it didn't happen that way at all for me. Being able to adapt my expectations as we went helped a lot for me!